What do you do when you feel like you’re stuck in a rut. Like you’re going through the same notions over and over yet you just can’t seem to get out. It’s almost like finally being able to step out of the quicksand to realize you’ve forgotten or dropped something and instead of letting it go; you let yourself go back and get it. When the same things keep happening over andover, how do you handle it? Do you reach out for that drink? Do you shut yourself away in solitude? Do you party hard? Do you completely ignore it? Do you deal with it? What do you do when everything makes you question your existence; your exact purpose for being right here on earth? More importantly what do you do when you realize you very likely won’t know or understand the answer to this upon asking? You’re left there with your hands in the air, eyes wide open, saying “now what?” and you feel like nothing you ever say or do will ever be enough.
Life is rigid. Relationships get messy. The path to those pearly white gates gets HARD! But that’s exactly what it is. A PATH! It’s supposed to be hard. There’s supposed to be bumps and blocks along the way. But those bumps and blocks don’t necessarily mean you stop mid-drive, get out of the car and throw yourself on the ground.
That’s exactly what I’ve been doing these past few months. I hit a road block… I get out and have my temper tantrum… and then I get back in and go around to another road block. I’m not getting out to mend the road. I’m continuously trying to find ways around the road only to be met with the same obstacle in my path and you know what? I’m exhausted! I’m tired of having to fight because the fight I’m putting up is the same fight over and over.